Post-Divorce Myths and Mistakes
Depending on the nature of your relationship, life after divorce can follow many different paths. Some people adapt quickly and go back to their single life surrounded by friends and family, others face the juggle of time-sharing with children, and many choose to focus on their career.
Over the years, many of our clients have kept in touch with us whether for legal advice, guidance, support or a quick update on their family. In our experience, we’ve seen and heard from post-divorce couples, and our clients have given us tremendous feedback.
The Dating Scene
Many clients have told us that taking a break and focusing on themselves, their children and family was time well spent. If you have an outgoing personality, it may be hard to avoid socializing with the goal of meeting someone new. For those more vulnerable or having a hard time letting go of the past, seeking out a new relationship too soon may lead to another disappointment.
If you have children together, remaining their mom or dad is priority number one. If anyone should advise you that calling to check on how your daughter’s doctor appointment went or making weekend arrangements is a bad idea and you should back off is the wrong message. It may take time to find the balance in this new family dynamic.
The New Friend
You meet someone, hit it off, and suddenly the sun is brighter. You can’t wait to introduce them to your family and kids. While that’s all great news, making sure you choose the right time to make this announcement could mean all the difference. For example, your children may not be as excited as you to meet the new “friend” in mommy or daddy’s life, especially at a family gathering. Bringing a “guest” to your ex’s home for a shared visit may not be the best approach in the early days either.
Believe it or not, some former spouses get along just fine or even better following a divorce. If you think friends and family expect you to share horror stories, badmouth or write off your ex, that’s not the case for everyone – and that’s just fine! The truth is, pretending that you don’t like them isn’t the same as not loving them anymore. It’s okay to share a common respect, while acknowledging that it just didn’t work as a marriage.
Our legal experts understand that once a divorce is finalized, it’s not necessarily over. Some clients go on to have counseling, others begin the new routine of time-sharing with children, and many continue to need legal advice for various matters that relate to the sale of a family home, parental rights, child support, alimony, and other common post-divorce issues. To schedule a private consultation, please contact us today. We’re here to help you.